worst. lesbian. ever. i'm not sure she knows a clit from a pencil eraser.
but there are maragaritas for $3 so that was all i needed to hear
i'm pretty sure the only people calling it "sexting" are ones who don't actually do it
Something smells like weed and I think it might be my mascara. Come sniff my eyes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's like a puppy that we have to take care of at all times or else she'll get sad, lonely, and chew on the furniture. And by 'chew on the furniture', I mean have anonymous sex.
I got carried out by security last night. AND the taxi had to drive up onto the sidewalk to get me i was that drunk.
Hey Kellie. Me putting. My face intebetaeen ut your boobs made my night
Nothing with ever convince me that she wasnt purposely left behind by our mother to ruin my life and fuck our family
U can be a future sentaor's wife if you want. I'm happy with "closet lesbian", "tech prof".and "masters degree" all rolled into one. Drunken bar escapades pay off.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Life goal: sit on his perfect beautiful David Archuleta-lookalike face
Two guys I banged regularly got married this week. I need vodka.
Officially locked in my status as an indifferent millennial by downloading Tinder.
Only true party girls take their birth control with Smirnoff.
He only has one ball. it was like fucking a cyclops.
Pretty sure this radio station is run by a cult. Good thing it's in Spanish, can't brainwash someone who can't understand you.
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