Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
the not having weed thing wouldnt be nearly as tragic if it wasnt the one holiday where they launch bright flaming things into the air
HOLY SHIT! Did you see the dick on that Great White Shark?!?!?!
just saw bouncers outside a coffee shop. beginning to question humanity.
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I don't know if the fire truck was perfect timing or if she actually burned something down.
I need a creepy friend to scare off the other creepy people
I would be honored to be that friend.
tried to be sexy and unbutton his shirt with my teeth. ended up slobbering all over it. thank god he was already passed out
There was a picture of him proposing on the night stand and their dog watched, but I can't help myself, his dick is just so perfect.
you were trying to control your nosebleed while having someone hold your four loko while you drank it through a straw. all at the same time. that is commitment.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I hate that you live in a gated community. I feel your guard judges me every time I go to your house at 3 am an leave at 5am
Hes drunk and dancing naked. I can hear his dick smacking his legs from the next room.
You have to summon your inner elephant
I immediately woke up from my nap, made myself a screwdriver and got in the shower. I know it's spring break but I'm still questioning my life choices.
Hi. Tara tells me your sandwiches and stamina are substantial
Vacuum the place before you go out of town there are random glitter cocks everywhere
Randomize