just gave a homeless man a kiss in exchange for two handles
exact location. now.
I'm eating my dinosaur chicken nuggets in the order they would die in the food chain.
I just had one of those moments where i was really sad that i'll never get to be asian.
the man who designed bathrooms to have toilets within easy puking distance from the shower is my hero
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
theres a turtle on the table. helping me eat my ramon noodles.
We made out while a LIT cigarette dangled out of the side of his mouth. Disturbing or slightly erotic?
admittedly, it's a little weird getting relationship advice from the mother of a former one night stand. but she's a wise lady and she buys me drinks, so i'm ok with it.
Dude you have to come get or im gonna nail this 64 y/o woman as repayment for buying me shots of jager
That was like a fiery explosion of flailing arms and wonderful passion
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I walked by the two of them and mouthed "fuck me" based on there reaction I think they just came in their pants
I now have a bottom rung on my kissing scale. Like I can say "Well. On a scale of Matt to Braxton he was probably a Zach." It's the little things.
As a general rule of thumb, I don't call until the claw marks have healed.
I just pulled a seven inch black hair out of my ass. Pretty sure that means we're dating now
What kind of friend would I be if I didn't make you hate things you once loved?
my dad just built a flame thrower.. you should probably get here
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