Jesus was obviously not given an itemized list of your sins before he died for them
i also saw a trio of peacocks walking along a sidewalk in hollywood today. i really hope im not tripping.
I'm going to kill the bastard that switches my hot hookups from the previous night with ugly chicks
Stop selling my mother weed! She's annoying as hell when she's stoned.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm drinkin whiskey outta the bottle trying to earn the trust of some ducks in the yard
I'm doing this for my boobs. They miss him.
There's a wake for a coworker on 420 during te time of 420... Hoping everyone will be too sad to notice how high I am.
Chelsea passed out in the kiddie pool. Just added around 28 boxes of jello powder. Will let you know how it works out
I've got 2 dollars. How do I turn this into alcohol?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You can't just snapchat me a picture of a pregnancy test and then not answer your phone
After 2 minutes he came and said, "thanks for everything". I can't wait to hear what he says next time when I do more than just lay there.
Honestly no idea how dad figured out i did all that gay porn unless he was looking at gay porn.
My debit card was between my ass cheeks when i woke up. i vaguely remember putting it there for safe keeping
Mike's letting gay guys do body shots off him again.
My boyfriend, ladies and gentlemen.
ATTENTION: just found out of have strep. if we have had sex in the past week, might wanna go to the doctor. if you plan to have sex with me in the next 20 days go buy some condoms. stupid antibiotics.
Randomize