Please tell me I didn't pass out while we were having sex last night... and if so I am sooooo sorry.
Skinny jeans should not be made in size 14. Then, it's just a lie.
No, he will live forever, like cockroaches and Jack Bauer.
Miss Michigan hasn't even been Miss USA for 24hrs and already stripper pole pics are surfacing. Classy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The straight man in me wants to hit on her. But the gay man in me wants to compliment her on her awesome outfit.
im just going to wait until i dont feel like the grim reaper is having sex with me
Apparently I was so drunk I threw my entire wallet at the stripper on stage. That was the third time I should've gotten kicked out.
Gotcha. Well, I'm puking and trying to keep down water from a mug that says "love the moment" around the rim. Not loving this particular moment.
Sleeping with random people is the same as soul searching, right? Ps that wasn't a team name suggestion.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When are you going to accept the fact he is gay?
Come on... He's just practicing.
Ok. That's acceptable.
Jesus Christ. How the fuck do you not tell someone that your wife can see on the phone bill who you text and how many times ?
I am now picking what guy I will hang out with based on how many Pokémon they live near.
I don't really care where everyone ended up, but is everyone alive and not in jail?
Not in jail
Alive?
By the time I realized I was watching a Danish porno with muppets it was already too late
I want to disappear from this job like a fart in the wind.💨
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