I'm sorry that you don't think that "Daddy Issues" are a real thing, but I can tell you that some assholes who never went to their daughter's dance recitals are responsible for getting me laid...continuously.
I could write a book called "things that come out of my vagina"
The only thing I have to prove last night happened is a fireman's hat full of puke.
I actually had to roll up my long sleeves to masturbate. I hate the winter
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ok I can't be your drugdealer AND booty call AND friend. It just doesn't work that way
So I just tried to wake him up with a blow job and he literally touched the top of my head and said snooze button
You have to keep an eye on her tonight cause you know how she likes to pickpocket people when she's drunk.
BTW my friend remembers her as "the one with the pronounced chin"
I thought he was being really sweet and protective when he pulled me away from the guy i was hooking up with, but turns out he just wanted me to get chicken nuggets with him...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We lost our room key and found it in his pocket with 3 pieces of fish.
I'm jealous, curious, and aroused. All at the same time.
My job here is done.
I peed outside 4 times after the bar, safe to say I had great night
so, i take that as a legit invitation into his pants
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
Just letting you know that I just spent 11 dollars on a car wash... Because you had sex in my car.
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