Oh, don't even get me started. Harry Potter is so pure. Twilight is just teenage girl porn.
my whole body is tingling just thinking about the orgasm hes going to give me
Just told him about my threesome. if that doesn't make him want to date me nothing will.
hr gave me pretxwk salad and a doubke shot of grey goose. i approve! tou guys are a beautidil couple.
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How do I tell my Dad that in the picture he has of me and my brother as the background of his phone we were both rolling face on ecstasy?
At a party. It smells like teen pregnancy and sadness in here.
I rocked my own world, he was just a prop.
Yeah I was thinking something along the lines of "I almost died, lets celebrate with sex. Come over"
This time tomorrow I'll be fingering you
Oh shit a waiter was leaning over me when i opened that and i felt him pause
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That which doesn't kill you gives you an excuse to get shitfaced later
Just remember that no one else gets to suck his dick but you, feel honored. It's like the Olympic torch of life is being passed off to you and it's your time to run
Hey the moment you step into my house, find me IMMEDIATELY so we can pinky promise on not roping anyone at the party into yet another threesome
i guess "never drinking again" is not an option when you invent a whole new level of drunk...
woke up this morning to a baggy full of adderall and two redbulls..i'm gonna marry this guy one day
I've realized that drinking at your apartment alone on a Tuesday probably isn't a good thing.
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