How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
the lady at Walgreens winked at me when i asked where the cherry chapstick was... damn u katy perry!
dude, never let a drunk girl playbite your dick. the doctor came in laughed and left.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Damn it, I know in the morning I'm going to regret eating out of the trash...
It was like having sex with a donkey. Everytime she got close she would kick me.
So I just bought underwear that says "I'm taken." Just know that when I cheat on my bf with you, that's what I'm wearing
I hit him with a car. Nothing says I hate you more than backing into someone with a fucking car.
He threw up. He never throws up. It was like finding out superman cant fly anymore. I was so sad for him.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She can drink whiskey without a chaser and has a fridge full of whipped cream. Girlfriend potential
Just gave my pregnant cat a safe sex talk. That high.
I literally walked into the toilet, looked at my reflection, said "alcohol" and went back to bed...
I tried to prevent a bar fight. By convincing a guy whacked out on Molly to slap the ass of everyone who was arguing and shout "WOO" each time. I'm proud, surprised, and intrigued that it calmed everyone down so quickly...
I just paid a hobo to give me his Santa hat so I can take Christmas nudes. Will send them later, they're fire.
you were so drunk that when the mouse on your laptop didnt work anymore you decided to just take it into the bathroom and pee on it while laughing like a mad scientist.
Randomize