dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
This morning when you woke up you looked like one of the Wii Bowling people. I think it was the eyebrows combined with the sambuca
Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
New Low: Just set a reminder on my phone for me to check on things I need to harvest late on Farmville.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I got drunk and applied for two credit cards last night. About to find out if anyone in this world is still dumb enough to give me credit.
Did you know even strippers have to have GED's these days??
He compliments me like a gay guy and fucks me like a starved nympho. I'm in love.
Is there a fine for having sex in the back of a zipcar?
Haha, you avoided her at all costs. And then she shoved her tits in your face
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
But I wanna cuddle and just put my hand awkwardly close to your penis area by accident and look at you
Somehow he made it really romantic
He came on your tits... That doesn't scream romance to me.
Do you understand how hard it is to go down on a guy underwater? Didn't think so....
I just smoked by myself in my childhood bedroom, how happy does it seem I am to be home for Christmas?
I have never been that aroused while laughing my ass off in my life
I’m torn. She’s crazy - like legitimately “Wear your skin as a suit” crazy. But her blow jobs and dirty talk are Pornhub quality!
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