my mother and i just seriously had a convorsation about why you cant Google "Refurbished Dildos"
They past out watching a re-run of the 1984 presidential debate on cspan
My valentine's day: watching The Notebook, and porn, eating chocolate, and ice cream. All while jacking off.
Wow... you've managed to cover all of the sad girl stereotypes that exist.
Yes I was being legit. That's the only plant I want in my house. A growing penis.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There is no amount of alcohol that can make me forget I had a Jimmy Kimmel sex dream
I seriously just caught my Pina colada from falling of a table perfectly facing up. I will now reward myself by finishing this one and then getting my 8th
You should have totally come, I started watering down vodka with cider. I have lost the sense of taste.
these are times I'm glad I'm Jewish because the Torah is just like "drink, eat, and fuck"
Just opened up the freezer to find chocolate penis popsicles. Too hungover for this shit
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm so glad I was blacked out while I was going all exorcist in the bathroom. That's so not a memory I want.
Ok, they now been on the roof for two days. I can see 4 cases of teecate and a carton of smokes. They are yelling at "fucking fall" and pissing off the roof.
I'm not sure New Orleans is real. Even the grocery stores sell vodka.
I feel like David Hasselhoff when he's drunk eating that cheeseburger and crying. But with cheesecake.
My skirt was too short for the church and I brought my flask to the Scrooge play. God bless us, everyone!
As in, legitimately worried. You just sent me a 6 message long text that did not contain any complete words.
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