I solve my problems like an adult, at the strip club drinking on a work night.
I need like a "Cookong High for Idiots" book. Or a car.
How was your sisters wedding?
Oh, I didn't go. I slept through my alarm. I finally woke up and was like...I don't think so.
sisterhood ftl.
i used the phrase horny rhinos in my paper. i hope my teacher appreciates the size of my balls
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
IDK but this explains my bloody dashboard.
i love all of you. Physical. Emotional. Mental. All of it. When we speak i feel like a feather or a dragon depending on the conversation ...
trapped on the roof of the strip club. help
I'm never waking up next to someone after sex again. It's alllll downhill from there.
It was over as soon as he asked if he could name my vagina pancake.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There are more dirty dishes in my bed then in the kitchen. Have I lost at life?
Also, I cannot stop picturing myself in a bar, 3 years from now ordering soda. Just soda. 30 pounds over weight and wearing a cat sweater. I feel like I'm heading in the wrong direction in life.
I didn't even have pants on and you think I had an agenda
Kelly and I just had sex, and you didn't call or text to interrupt, are you alive? We are both concerned.
I accidentally mass texted his dick pic. Not only to my friends, but to my dad as well...
I'm covered in bite marks and have a cracked rib - was a good weekend
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