some old guy just shit himself in my section. everyones leaving
I take no responsibility of who alcohol hooks up with using my body!
where does the pee come out of this thing
i have essays due online every friday...im just going to write 'im hungover' for every one
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Found my little brother jerking off with a condom. he said he was "practicing"
OMG its one we used last night
apparently the bartender would rather give me free shots than tell me that my whole nipple piercing was hanging out
mom just made me 'sorry-you-have-hpv-pancakes'
I like the odds of his and my children being professional athletes too. To support me in my old age, see I do think about the future.
The neighbor just yelled bring me back that big red alien penis.
The girl neighbor.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't know if apple cider everclear was such a good idea
dude I don't even care if I'm getting catfished the point is I'm going to get laid. hot bitch, fat bitch, skanky bitch, i don't care my penis is having an adventure tonight regardless
We did it to 80's cardio music. Talk about a workout.
its 11:20. i'm drunk in class flying paper airplanes for my final. what the fuck is my college experience right now?
Thanks for the hospitality last night.
You mean sex?
Yes....hospitality.
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
Randomize