My parents took my cat for a ride in the car. Second weekend in a row. They think its fun. Dear God
I can see my step sister's thong. Don't know if I should let myself be turned on or not
Holy fuck. She looks like Vin Diesel's stuntman
she's sitting on the other side of the room at this party. with her smirnoff tucked in that little opening between her cleavage and shirt. drinking from a straw. snapping her fingers off beat.
it's love
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Highlight of my evening, pile of books falling onto me in front of people
two words: eviction party
It's not normal to lose a tooth eating a McDouble.
i just called. the lady was really nice. something tells me my schools clinic gets a lot of calls about chlamydia
i feel like you're just hanging onto the edge of functioning wino.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wish they made people sized litter boxes.
He has pizza coupons and a hammer next to his toilet.
MASS TEXT: Lets start a new tradition. Black Friday log pic contest. I'm waiting.
Use "feeling words"
Yay
You know I love you more than life itself, but love has its limits. And so help me god, if you bail on me, I will fucking watch the last Game of Thrones episode without you.
Tonight I learned to never try to impress your ex by dancing on the stripper pole while drunk. That’s how you end up in the ER
Randomize