Third unemployed latin in my bed this week. I'm on a roll
its impossible for me to find something that fits my tits my muffin top and my ass all at the same time
why are all my papers due the day after my potential hangover
Good idea. You gotta take care of your vagina. She takes care of you. Pay it forward.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I vaguely remember making out with his tattoo (?) and giving him an awesome massage and then I passed out on his floor. Shrug
U should feel bad.. u r like a sex politician. All talk and no follow thru
You better keep a close eye on your uterus tonight cause I am looking good.
That's what my new years consisted of. Consoling heartbroken girls and having people throw up in my hands.
Just saw a midget on an elliptical. Epic.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We have so much sex to catch up on
Figured out how I got so much alcohol in my hair: tried to drink my drink using my cleavage as a cup holder. Missed my drink hole and got it all in my hair
The international association of gay square dance clubs had a booth set up in the lobby of my hotel.
So I'm pretty sure I told every one at the party that "I'm going to fuck my pillow pets tonight?"
why yes, bad decisions will be made starting at 3PM Thurs through 8PM on Sun. You have been warned. Plan accordingly.
After everything I’ve done… had sex with people off tinder, gone to clubs and bars, gone to hockey games…. I get Covid at GRANDMAS HOUSE
Randomize