I pooped in a mop bucket.
WTF???
Their employee restroom was locked what kind of customer service is that
Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
I cant date a girl that sucks dick at sucking dick
Um I just overheard that the new guy spent a month in jail. Obvi another great hire.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If there is a god, you will have pink eye tomorrow.
Best part of failing a semester of college: not having to buy books next semester. I can drink to that
when someone at the bar asked you a question all you knew how to say was "chug-a-lug"
Yes and yes. Got taken to a Florida strip club. I desperately want to flood my eyes and ears with hand sanitizer right now.
True enough. Do you ever think that these girls grandparents ghosts are watching you masterbate to their granddaughters and look at you in Shame?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is not a costume party, I'm just wearing fairy wings.
Of course you are.
I never thought I could be this turned on by a man wearing racoon tails.
She's seen your dick through your pants. You don't need to ask
I AM GONNA CUM EVERYWHERE TONIGHT BRO.
Update: I just threw up in between cars in the parking lot of magic kingdom.
You told me you could hear my heartbeat through my penis but your methods were unethical.
Sixty five beats a minute. I stand by that.
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