My roommate just did the walk of shame in last nights corset back to our room to find her dad there. THATS why i go to school out of state.
So apparently I ran down the hall to another party and started handing out uncooked spaghetti to strangers. You'd be surprised how many drunk people will eat raw noodles.
life is sad when you just turned 21 and youre doing late night rogaine runs...
Dude, you walked in on me 5 times each times you had a different person with you. And each time you lifted the covers up and said 'whats going on in here'
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Drinking franzia alone at noon watching a cheese themed episode of "The Chew" I'm ready to admit I need a job.
He walked door to door asking if anyone needed to get laid. Surprisingly, that ended his drought
She kept pulling joints out of her bra and asking strangers for birthday hugs.
Oh my goodness please please please my inner slut needs some pampering, shes getting rusty and nothings worse than a rusty slut
I think mark twain said that originally
My fuck buddy is great and all, but it gets weird when she gets in arguments with her BF in the driveway
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When you woke up the first word out of your mouth was "whoa"
I was feeling the aftermath of his penis
Would it be wrong to text my ex and say "congratulations on the new baby that you had with a stripper"?
This is what we get for finishing a whole box of Franzia by ourselves
He was basically a horny puppy - following me around all night and kept sticking his hand down my pants.
Even with help how did you paint a bullseye around your asshole?
He's a fucking ninja- think of the things he can probably do with his dick.
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