i told him i was sober and he walked away immediately.
Goodbye hot boy in my geo class...goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. you have been the one, you have been the reason I came to claassss
well at that point we were just fucking to keep warm.
i think i had a heart attack, prayed, and jizzed my pants.all at once.
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Is it really road head if took place on kayaks in the river?
AND I JUST GOT FUCKING DAUGHTER ZONED. NO. I'M DONE. I HATE BOYS. ASEXUALITY HERE I COME.
I woke up on the dog bed, bottle of alcohol still in hand and my thong was hanging off the family portrait.... Yikes
I just want to let you know how hung over I am today and I fucked a girl in a kangaroo costume last night.
I just blocked a guy on grindr for having a little dick. See? I do have standards.
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There was a point where you were singing "Friends in Low Places" to yourself while Juicy J was playing so I got worried.
I'm about to have a bowl of Advils... without any fucking milk.
He was wearing running shoes tho. Thats like the cardinal rule. You don't fuck a guy who wears running shoes as regular shoes.
My diet has been 80% Fun Dip this week, soooo, no. Not good.
I am more than mildly offended he didn't screenshot the snapchat of my boobs.
You remember my neighbor with the perfect ass? It's even better in assless chaps.
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