oh. my. god. the guy i hooked up with last night is currently wearing a dress.
Today I made a list of everyone I have had sex with...there is more than double my age...
she wrote "SORRY" in her vomit and left
I told her the white crusty stuff on my boxers was frosting not cum. She seemed MORE grossed out then
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think it's safe to say taking shots on the way to the emergency room was rock bottom. We're going to need to think of ways to top that between now and next new years eve...
Youre attempt to ruin my night by putting Date Rape by Sublime on my sex playlist failed. She was into it.
I found a video of myself completely naked on my phone giving a drunk tutorial on how to shit properly while blindfolded. Did you record it?
He woke up, yelled "RALLY!" and then puked in my glove compartment
I don't have time to shower before my passport photos...your cum is all over my hair...that's with me for 10 years now
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We were having a serious discussion about Blue's Clues and I just kept thinking, 'you've seen me naked'.
My vagina has a heartbeat. That means I'm in love, right?
I have his gate key so know he has to see me again.
I have 4 more smokes and 6 more beers to go before I make a life changing decision like that.
So who has the penis shaped party tray? You or your mom?
u ever get horny for food. i ordered a bunch of crepes and its doin it 4 me
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