I created a new tequila drink. it is a mix of excitement and fear instilled in innocent people.
do you want me to make hamburgers?
i'm vegan
i'll put lettuce on them
at first I thought it was funny, but looking at it now, it screams "dramatic" and "medicated wipes."
I just called my cat a slut and she responded. Proudest moment ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
disregard all texts ive sent you minus taco motherfucking bell
apparently there was a flour fight and couch sex...
You tried to luge a beer down a flip flop.
Its... i dont even know. theres lots of rap music and i cant find my shoes
An outback commercial just played and I remembered that guy from Australia Imade out with at the Derby. Great Bachelorette Party, btw.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't wait til I'm a real grown up and am no longer expected to take 7 shots of raspberry ruby as a pregame to a night of drinking natty lite
Thanks for putting up with my drunk friend last night. Its all fun and games till someone pukes macaroni under your fridge.
I swear, the guy behind me wasn't paying attention until the words "middle aged fuckboy" came out of my mouth.
A friendship for the ages born on how horny we both are
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
Do you realize our room single-handedly hooked up with most of that wedding party last night?
Randomize