Mr ***** is in bed with his super hot wife giving her 18 inches of pleasure
would you consider him our boss?
technically yes
then technically i slept with our boss
i was so drunk that there were 2 of her, and i didn't know which one to fuck
Tell your boss that he's keeping you from eating a fuck sundae off of these 36-24-36 34 D's waiting for you at home on Valentine's Day.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You blacked out and walked in on my neighbor breast feeding at 3am yelling "where is my best friend". I think we should go apologize.
I just ate powdered extacy out of my wallet. I think I might have for a second of my reasonable life been on your level.
There are reggae songs being written about me...where have I gone wrong in life?
The lady at walmart just said she is so happy im still alive....Was i that drunk on the 4th? Dont answer that
Literally just had a girl put her street name into my phone. Yeah.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My bad man. I was at a strip club, and apparently it's like a big deal to take your phone out in one of those places.
Major life highlight, she said my dick taste like coffee.
do you think eating a burger while having sex counts as multitasking skills?
She rode me like a jockey on that tiny couch. Then we spooned.
Tequila. The ruiner of all good intentions.
She’s 47 and wants me to fuck her on her mom’s hospital bed
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