She looked like her face caught fire, and someone put it out with a screwdriver.
I don't know if the fire truck was perfect timing or if she actually burned something down.
Taking my final with a coffee mug full of keystone... best semester ever.
my nipple ring is gone but someone was nice enough to replace it with a paperclip
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Go big or go home. i snuck in two beers in my bra. im here to win.
We 6 way cheers-ed with French fries last night, hammered, in the booth.
I broke out the Krispy Kreme, and am possibly having random internet sex in less than an hour. I think I got this breakup under control.
What if he turns back to me, finds me seemingly fondling my breasts, and thinks I'm turned on by eagles?
He fingered me in a Waffle House bathroom and then stole a traffic cone. Is this love that I'm feeling?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Today is my 3 year wedding anniversary...and I've seen three different dicks.
Being in nursing school really pays off when your dealer tries to pass off naproxen as Percocet. Like I may have made a C in pharm but I aced the pain drug test
I don't know what to say to you.
I don't know what I said to you. Start with that.
You kept running around yelling "I need my pajamas" & then you got naked. Shit just went downhill from there.
whered you go
woke up in a ditch, shat infront of a little league game, slept in her stairway...i need to come here more often
Thanks for going with me today. It’s been a long time since I bought bra and panties because of a guy
It’s called “shopping for lingerie” and it’s one of the many exciting and sexy things that follow a divorce, along with sexting, sleepovers, and orgasms
But, our next lesson is picking up a younger guys at the bar!
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