My gyno actually laughed when I told her about his penis size.
you got in your car and made the sounds of a NASCAR, then called me on your phone and I was your pit crew. then you apparently you won the race, and THAT'S when you tried to backflip off the top of your car.
just had to take a 4 hour nap to write a one page paper. its obviously the week after winter break.
Just got to costco. Where are you?
Liquor aisle, bring another cart.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
yea i guess its safe to say fire extinguishers are not synonymous with whip cream cans
Just ran four miles to popeye's. And back. Dedication.
I think once you know a guy's chest measurements the stalking has gone too far..
I got your flops too. But yeah you rolled off your raft a bunch of times so we had to ask the white trash squad to help you back on. You bit one of them
I have a corndog on my dresser and a trashcan of puke. Thanks for a great night!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well shove his head down there and tell him not to stop til we have a new president!
Do you ever get so high you're like vibrating
In theory, it seemed like it would work.
I'll give you a blowjob in a Santa hat if it will put you in the Christmas spirit
Why did my mother make you get naked?
Someone threw up pink in the shower, there's a golf cart tipped over on the lawn and Cousin Brian is missing. What could Friday night throw at us?
Randomize