Sadly no. But I was pantsless when they came to get me. Which made me miss you...
no, he came in my armpit
the power's out. i'm smoking weed by flashlight
i wish i was dedicated to anything like you are to weed
FUCK TREES I CLIMB BUOYS MOTHERFUCKER
STOP listening to that song
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Care to explain to me why theres a baby food jar filled with semen in my fridge? or why its labeled as unicorn sweat?
He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
I just found out you can file for divorce online. I love America.
It's not mothers day until you're vomitting syrup into grandma's toilet. Cherish the holidays
My dad is drinking wine out of a measuring cup. This explains so much.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm just here to guide your spirit, avoiding herpes is on you though
I think that "I fucked your little brother" wasn't the best way to introduce yourself.....
Maybe she'll change her mind but the "go fuck yourself" doesn't seem promising
I don't think he likes that I'm always sending him pictures of me in my bra but he needs to get it together
I just lost my handcuff virginity and not in the sexy way.
Bruh. You offered the cashier tater tots that you had stuffed in your pocket.
Yeah, and? She might've been hungry.
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