Drunken candy land NOW. Dont fight the urge... you want to.
ya i found him eventually. hes the only one who drinks guiness so I just had to follow the darkest green puke trail
I also referred to her clitorous as her "vagina dot" last night...probably going to be dumped soon.
I was pissing in the urinal at the concert and some drunk chick ran in and yelled 'but the lines to fucking long' then ran out with 10 state troopers chasing her... Yeah
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My living room is scattered with glow sticks wrappers, sparklers, face paint & beer cans?
It's not as cool looking when the drugs wear off, is it?
I will no longer accept being cock blocked in my own bed.
One my way home. There was too much fog, strobe lights, and cocaine for my taste.
I don't even know if I LIKE sober sex any more.
SHE WON'T ROUND UP MY GRADE! I have a 79.8% I ONLY MISSED TWO CLASSES!!! ONE WHEN I GOT DRUGGED AND ONE WHEN MY CAR GOT BROKEN INTO!! I'm interculturally competent. I used to date a Italian/Cherokee Indian. I fucked a Palestinian. How much more pro-peace can you get?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
id one day like to live in a world full of emotionless and wonderfully fullfilling sex...
In case you're wondering what frozen hashbrowns taste like at 4 in the afternoon, shame. They taste like shame.
At least you didn’t announce to an entire bar you’ve eaten pussy, and then knocked your beer over.
Visions of polite missionary are dancing in my head right now kinda and it alarms me
Her handjob consisted of slapping me in the balls. I am never hooking up with her ever again ever.
I feel like you're encouraging me to commit a felony.
I feel like you're wasting time.
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