speaking of unleashing monsters, we need to get condoms
Forget abc fam drinking games. Take a shot everytime Tyra says I and you'll be dead by the first commercial
NEVER shave your cleavage hair.
When i woke up this morning she asked me 'when did you first find out that you could see the future.' I gotta stop drinking.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was on hold waiting for customer service at verizon so we obviously we had enough time to have sex, i just put the phone on speaker
I was topless in his bathroom sink taking bong rips , goodmorning . He told me he could get use to this
Exactly. So you're exempt under the "I can't just fuck her to make it go away" clause of 2010.
You'll have to pretend I'm texting you with buddychecks.
Like the Jimeny Cricket of cockblocks.
Actually some of the best sex I've had involved a lot of laughing.
How small IS your cock?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You gotta buy me dinner first. Or smoke me out. Both are equally chivalrous
Quick question. How did my clothes end up in your room on your bed and I end up outside your room naked on your couch?
I need to reevaluate. My boss gave me drug money. I overslept on my couch. And I had my student teacher go to McDonald's and get an egg mcmuffin for me.
Someone messaged me on POF and wished me a Happy International Women's Day. Why do I even bother anymore?
idk what to be more embarrassed/confused about, that i lost my underwear or that i woke up covered in fried rice
He got mad at you last time bc you tried to rap battle him via text. This is strictly business.
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