He's gotten way too comfortable around me. He came into the bathroom and took a shit while I was in the shower.
We discussed our relationship status. We're dating exclusively. And the conversation was followed by him saying "C'mon baby, let's make you orgasm!" .....I'm gonna marry him.
found a pic of my little bro & his girl naked. he got the brains and the huge junk gene. I hate him
She thinks I'm afraid I'm gonna get caught in one of my lies and some of the girls I'm fucking will find out about each other. But it would be a relief to offload a few from the old crop and work in a few newbies into the rotation. The organization could use some new blood.
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You might have been able to redeem yourself had you not referred to grandma as "this bitch".
That explains the hand print on my face. That old lady knows how to throw a punch.
I grinded with the guy who brought the scooter, I'm leaving with success
He was so aggressive it felt like he was giving my boob a root cannal
After fooling around at the hotel til dawn, I managed to feed her with my free buffet passes. Tastes like sweet victory.
The nice lady at the neighborhood liquor store informs me that we have a new woman-run neighborhood sex shop. Jesus loves me and wants me to have a happy Valentine's day.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't take a pillow from my bed. You don't know which ones of them my vagina has been on
This guy knew what he was doing. Most guys can't find the spot even if it shot off a flare and played a kazoo.
so after 3 days of looking i found the keg...looks like somebody tried burying behind the garage
I need to hurry up and get over my feelings for him so next year's tipsy reunion sex won't be clouded by emotions.
He was my first marine! I wanna remember his name!
I apparently sent an offer letter to, and then subsequently onboarded, the wrong candidate. How's your Monday?
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