You should get sea herpes
I mean sea horses
Someone told me that drinking would get me no where in life. Drinking has gotten me everywhere in life.
you told him you liked to chip your nail polish to look like different countries. im gonna guess that no, you didn't sleep with him.
They are baked and once again have spent the last 45 mins talking about opening up a world wide business called "pickle on a stick"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Okay. Did anyone see me spend $1600 at the strip club last night? Or is this someone else's receipt in my pocket?
Missing part of a tooth cos I tried to open a beer with my teeth, just saw a dude that looked like bill Cosby though so things are looking up
The fact that I'm going to be living with you is starting to make me worry about my heatlh.
Ya that ship has sailed dude
I'm not gonna lie. I'm a little scared.
Good. The Jell-O shots look great.
Dude, he paid us overtime to smoke weed out of a bong at his house
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He said his name was Tony, after last night I will refer to him as Tiny
He came on my face and he was genuinely concerned about getting it in my hair. I'm marrying him.
Ok so I'm not gonna ignore the fact that you had sex on a frat basement floor and spent the last 4 years wondering how you got HPV
Just almost drowned myself in the shower again. I need an adult.
Thus began an intricate shell game of nude cardigan photos
you need to drop off my dinner before you go see him because i'm not gonna wait until you're finished fucking him to get my damn chinese food
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