Got a little crazy huh? Happy st pattys day. None of you have any idea where my credit card would be do you? How do i always lose
I told my rommate that he was pissing on his bed. He said "ok man" and took a step backwards and continued. He then went back to bed.
Someone left a beer in front of your door...there's a note with it that says "peace offering"
Handcuffed. To. Steering. Wheel. Fuck.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it's been dubbed the summer of antibiotics
Alright, my brain isn't sure how to properly function on a Wednesday with no hangover and more than 3 hours of sleep.
Like do you realize his dealer came out with a gun and we laughed like it was all just fun and games...
I guess, just don't make it awkward
MY FUCK BUDDY'S MOTHER FRIEND REQUESTED ME! IT'S ALREADY AWKWARD COREY
Next sat night Titanic party. Bring your floaties, trashy necklaces, and a large lung capacity. This ship is going downnnnnnn.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He tried to spell out "PROM?" in his cum on my stomach during sex. It was terrible
well did you say yes?
That's why we don't trade sex for Taco Bell. It's called the dollar menu.
You are lucky that I'm drunk. Otherwise I would bone you into another universe
Took my plan b at Costco today, sample Sunday for the win.
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
I really just gave up on masterbating because I'm too tired. I really am getting old.
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