I heard we made out
Just set all my clocks a minute apart. Now my 4:20 is longer by sixfold
and then she yelled "im going to fuck the next guy that walks by me". so ya thats how i lost my virginity
you thought you were invisible so you started narrating your actions.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
You're doing that 'overestimating how much I care' thing again.
I had to feed him the pizza because he was too blazed to do it himself
Sex should not remind me of how baby birds get fed
Also-when I die, I want it to be with my arms above my head so that when rigor mortis sets in, my breasts are perky.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
On a completely different note: my hookup and i are now in a semester GPA competition. Winner gets froyo and sexual favors. School just got interesting.....
Don't masturbate while listening to Pandora. Just came during a buffalo wild wings commercial and I feel really weird about it.
He's like a Lana del Rey song that took human form
Can't find my wig, my underwear, or my dignity. Halloween 2016
I keep worrying the police are going to come looking for us.
For which one? Starting a fire on my porch or having sex on my porch?
I told my parents how nice the girl at the frogurt store was. I neglected to mention that I nearly lost my virginity to her via foursome.
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