Sitting in class thinking wow im glad im not hungover...and then i realized im still drunk.
just found preset five on the shower head...pretty sure my pussy just had a panic attack
the only good thing about these hospital visits are the free pregnancy tests
I did, I'm just saying. Once the drinking starts my nipples are no longer my control.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just explain how I got from the bar to a house I've never been in, waking up to a cop in uniform ripping a bong
C'mon. I'm still an alcoholic at heart, regardless of its broken or not
TACOBELL COOL RANCH TACOS MARCH 7TH. I think realistically that will be more like valentines day for us. Bc nothing says romance like tacobell.
You're not drunk til you wake your roommates up screaming at your ceiling fan
Haha its fine we ask know it. He's still cool thought
Focus on the keyboard man. Focusssss
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He plays D&D and his dick should be carved out of marble. I think I'm in love.
To be honest. I have two poptarts in my jacket pockets. No one knows. I am pro stealth.
Someone needs to lock me in a chastity belt because all my vagina does is get me into trouble. Fuck.
It's a shame, really, because he's got the cock of a horse... And the personality of dry toast.
So I have three weeks to get rid of his girlfriend and fuck him senseless before he goes to jail
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
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