my girlfriends now gay ex-boyfriend kissed me. tell maddie i can't hangout today
I just realized that when I walk away people probably say "wow she really has a drinking problem" and sadly it doesn't bother me.
Moved my bed either I'm a whore or every guy I have ever slept with hid condom wrappers under my bed
It must be a full moon weekend. All of my weird booty calls are coming out of the woodwork. I spent 40 minutes on the phone last night telling one why he is so creepy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Getting up at 8 this morning to drink could be the best and the worst idea we've ever had
so i was eating a special k bar this morning for breakfast and started choking on it so i reached into my bag for water turns out it was liquor.
I drunk dialed my ex-boyfriend last night. He was sitting next to my new boyfriend. Shoot me in the face.
Do you ever just feel the storm building inside of you that tells you you're ready for a giant indiscriminate fuckfest?
I just had a 10 minute staring contest with my dog. Can you come over?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was informed this morning that I took all my clothes off and ran around the whole apartment complex. Being as they just moved in, welcome to the neighborhood.
Seeing my ex post concert Snapchat videos as an Instagram really reinforces that I made the right choice...
Dont worry, the Canadians are more afraid of you then you are of them.
HE'S FUCKING 19 YEARS OLD, HE CAN'T EVEN GET INTO A BAR WITH ME, WHAT MAKES YOU THINK I'LL LET HIM IN MY PANTS?!
Just so you know, I choose to answer your bootytext tonight because it was the most creative.
It's weird having sex with someone you actually like
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