Tell me I did not drive one hour for whiskey dick.
The jonas brothers playing in your laptop. This is why guys won't sleep with you...
hot girl, 5 o clock
do you know how to read a clock?
I bought the love spell lotion from victoria secret so it atleast smells like a girl is present while I'm masturbating
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it took me 2 minutes to realize that it wasn't HER hand on my penis. First, and worst threesome ever..
RJ thinks I should put one of the muffins in my vagina. Good idea or bad idea?
Somebody left a mini pitcher in the bathroom. Think its safe?
I pretended I didn't remember seeing him hookup with that freshman, and he pretended he didn't remember seeing me hookup with that old guy. We have a beautiful and unawkward friendship.
How many tongue depressors should I need to steal from urgent care to make samurai armor?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is literally engraved into my seat "Need crack?" And then there's a number. This isn't real.
You're worse than that girl who made out with her cousin at that party
That was you...
Just came so hard my back cracked. Other women are totally missing out if they don't masturbate.
Maybe don't sell him so much adderall next time. The other day during finals he was convinced that he could see the "molecules of life in the air" and kept reaching up slowly to grab them.
We're meant to be. Apparently God wants me to get dicked down pretty good too so I'm not complaining about destiny
I need to go home for the safety of everyone in a 10 mile radius, especially me
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