I just got hit in the face by an old lady love handle.
For once I'm glad there wasn't morning sex. Yes, that sore from the night before.
Just an FYI: The offer for you to come snow blow my driveway in return for sexual favors is still on the table
Your mom just threw up on me. Please come home.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He just told me the blow job I gave him was like a journey
Honest opinion...too aggressive to bring the funnel out to the bar? Also just so you know im at the bar. with the funnel.
If you make 120 dollars and I walk instd of drive and don't eat or smoke this week we can pay rent
He was having Sex and you yelled 'hot and dangerous!" and he responded with "if you're one of us then roll with us!" when he went to he bathroom I saw her getting dressed, looking mortified.
its 2pm. u awake yet?
ill text u back later. still peeling fingernail polish off my face.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So...guess who had sex tied to the ladder of a caboose under the stars in Joshua Tree? This bitch
She started giving me head while we were watching the Walking Dead premiere, WORST BJ EVER.
The holidays are too long. I always run out of adderall before I run out of family. you got any left?
She wasn't one for labels or anything serious really but while she was riding me she yelled marry me. It's like she fucked her self into commitment lmao she realy is a keeper bro
I'm excited for him and his new girlfriend. I'm just going to miss his penis is what I'm saying.
I just remembered I casually gave you a tour of the house after we boned...lol
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