I just got a bj @ my old preschool...my childhood memories r all ruined
gettin drunk isnt as much fun when i can use my own id for it
Good ideas don't start with we have a bottle of vodka..
I woke up to the sound of a beer can being opened. I love him already
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When I came in she was screaming "boundaries!" at the cat because it was trying to eat her pizza rolls.
Come over. Drunk tacos.
That isn't even a sentence.
I kept the important parts.
I just washed out an empty chocolate milk bottle to take whiskey on my bike ride.
You are not an adult
Her vagina was like a painting you can put your face in.
I like the wholesome side of you
I'm so goddamned horny I could use all my pent up energy to tear a redwood out by its roots.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Shoot me. Oh my god shoot me. My moms ex "likes assholes"
Is it possible to break your brain with drugs?
Just had my very first high conversation with mom
And you survived it! I'd say that earns you a "Blaze It Like a Real Adult" from the Grown-up Girl Scouts
She shoved her hand down my pants and held my cock for thirty minutes in the bar. It was like she was letting all the other females know I was hers.
She showed up at 4:30 in the morning HAMMERED, stripped, demanded sex, then after 4 failed attempts stopped me mid-thrust to tell me she thought we should be fucking for a cause, like animal rights. Process that for a second. She wanted us to be fucking for animal rights.
i out mim tonsoeep
Randomize