Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
I love waking up with his head head between my legs, it makes me feel special
This needs to stop. I just vacuumed the wall. Adderall is a double edged sword.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ive consumed more rum studying for law school finals than I did that time I fucked that fat chick in the back of VW Beetle. It's all ugly, but for different reasons.
She rode an inflatable shark down the stairs. Viva shark week.
Thanks to you and Ketel One I now have a court summons with the actual word "frolicking" on it.
The one time my sister did shrooms she thought she was thumbalina. I can't live my life that way
I will have to bone him sometime between now and July so he will move all my shit again
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Have you ever just sat there and thought about past penises?
Woke up with an e-cig stuck in my asshole. Explain.
yeah I woke up in jail with two different shoes on and neither of them were mine
Listen. You dont know how advanced you are in yoga till you have to shave your butthole
I'm planning our wedding on the computer and our threesome on my phone. At the same time.
You passed out in my backseat like a legitimate infant. A really drunk, really horny infant
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