Wait, we're on the hunt for addys and explosives. They're both in this house somewhere.
Judging by the grocery store, everyone stocked up on frozen pizza and beer for the blizzard. If our generation ever faces doomsday, we'll go out smiling.
closing bar tabs have helped me with simple math in college.
I have a music final in an hour so I put all the classical songs we need to know in a shower power hour playlist, beer included.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
asked the girl next to us on line to take a picture of us and she shared her bacardi. i love white people.
Also I think he would slowly, painfully, die. You really can't live without a penis. You'd explode.
she tied the funnel to the fucking ceiling...
she just nodded and said "yeah, I'd fuck him for a reese's peanut butter cup". it's so nice to know I'm not the biggest whore living here
We just broke my bed mid-sex, laughed, then continued. If that isn't true love I don't know what is.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm so high that hamburger just went up my nose. Mustard BURNS
Dropped the bowl in the litter box. But it landed face up. What do I do?
Exactly man. Who needs doctors when you have vodka and hot knives.
If there was a gecko involved in your BDSM I'm gonna have to request that not happen when we live together ;)
I was grinding on my boss last night. So Monday will be fun. That's what's going on in my life right now.
It wasn't my fault.
You let her suck your neck. Yes it was your fault.
Randomize