dude why did you let me call her?!
i told you it was a bad idea and to quote you exactly, you said "no, it's a good idea..that's what people do when they love each other." you met her 15 minutes prior to that conversation...
Dude. Fucked her last night. Fucked her this morning. went downstairs for water. took 18 pack of Coors Light instead and took it back to my gf's. Got a blow job from her. Drinking the beer on my deck now. Best Day ever.
Found moms dildo in drawer while looking for socks, and its wet
this is ridiculous... i look like a white version of MC Hammer...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
fyi, we didn't break up, we just downgraded to occasional sex without ever talking about it.
Some fat girl belted her graduation gown. That is not a good look for anyone.
you had sex with a 30 year old who doesn't have a cell phone but does have an 8 year old son.
he's 29.
the weed was in a baggy that had little penguins on it. i am so excited you have no idea
Drunkkker than when I told the drag queen she was prettier than me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just did a jell-o shot with my grandmother. I can die now..
He was on my bed looking at me like a sacrifice to the gods of gay sex and he's definitely a bottom. Like Jesus Christ a really, really great ass of a bottom.
Got to work this morning and thought... Did I really dance on that pole last night
This is why we can never be just regular friends. The shit we do is not regular
Did I penguin dive down a hill last night?
If he brings home bacon, dont let him leave. Dont screw this one up. this may be our last chance.
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