dude I went to cubs game with my mustache, aviators, and a hooded sweatshirt. Do you think it was irony or fate that there were four 17 year old girls in front of us?
Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
the real housewives reunion is on...i wanna see if danielle can look any more surprised than the facelift allows
i wanna see dina punch her face back to normal
can you take me to a tanning bed
sure, why though?
i have to go once so i can blame these herpes on the tanning bed and she won't get suspicious
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
nothing like a tattoo of a large eagle attacking a small eagle whos attacking a shark to bond to siblings together for life
it's my sixth sense. If there's an orgy within 20 miles of me i'll know about if. Or be a part of it.
My cab driver just started a conversation with "Three years ago I pleaded guilty..." Check on me later tonight please.
Lets get coked out and steal a parrot this summer
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He literally wrote out a schedule. On it, there's a taco break, and a spot where I start crying.
Which sister was it? The one I accidentally hit when my shoe flew off or the one I ate candy off of when we were high?
I know how to kill a man with nutmeg and a sword. You in?
Or nah
It's confirmed. I have two dates on Saturday, and they are both named Mike.
Dude I can't beleive you didn't wake up. I literally f'd her IN THE DISHWASHER. Btw I'm pretty sure I also kinda broke the dishwasher.
If you wear a peguin suit you MUST send me a picture!!!
Randomize