I need to stop researching the drugs I do on Wikipedia. The parts about abuse and dependency hit too close to home
Would you like me to write a persuasive essay on how you should let me suck your dick?
At what point should i just give my brother a break and stop sleeping with his friends?
Just sneezed out a half gram of coke into a tissue. Four hours after the fact. The bender continues.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
First if all, whoever designed penis shaped ice cubes is clearly daring me to shove them up my vagina
The best way to start drinking is as early as possible. eg, this bar isn't open but we're patiently waiting outside. That way you're confident and exciting when the talent arrives. Or too drunk to care.
She danced with a broom while telling me I was "cool as shit" and she "wishes she could take a portion of my big ass and attach it to hers" then she passed out
We're gonna have horrible, horrible babies.
Either I'm drunk or judge Judy has 3D commercials...so I think I'm drunk. Also I may or may not haven eaten a hoagie on the toilet when I didn't want to stand up
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Btw if you ever get emails that pretty much contain 'bwahhhhh jatkkvsweuo' it's safe to assume it's me.
All you have to do is speak. Your voice reverberates strait to my vagina.
Despite popular belief cocaine is not a good pre-workout
As he was cumming he yelled "Yahtzee" then said im free to go. Thats my one night stand
We were mid fuck, and he did a Kermit the Frog impression. Is it weird that I was strangely turned on?
Like don't initiate a threesome when we're all watching SPONGEBOB. That's like sacrilege.
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