you proceeded to suck on ur pinkie saying it reminded you of chris and you wanted him badly
relax...and go to your happy place, which probably has a lot of dicks
I've come to accept that no matter where I step in our apartment, your underwear will be there.
Well on a positive note, crystal light now comes in margarita flavor
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm lying topless with an eye infection at the foot of my bed with a dog between my legs. With disney in the background. Its one of those 3 am moments
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
they had to take the Corona's out of the fish tank because they wouldn't fit with the mini replica of the roman coliseum in there. so we drank the Corona's. does beer have an expiry date?
Do the molecules within bourbon change when mixed with a cola to form a superior liquid treat?
People will say "JOE YOU MUST TURN DOWN" and I will refuse, in the name of liberty.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This strange Italian man told me he wants to take me for ice cream and kept calling me "tomato" from tinder
Hahaha more like walk of pride. You entered the lions den last night.
Fair warning: I will be throwing corn dogs at you every time I see you this week.
His birthday is on Valentines Day, of course he's getting a blowjob
I just got a text from a guy. The python is ours if we want.
Drunk sex on a hardwood floor is never ever a good idea. Lesson learned.
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