As my groomsman, I expect you to learn the Thriller dance with me before next September.
Actually, all he talks about is how great the sex is with her and how crappy you were at it. Stop being a bitch and gossiping masking it as self-righteousness.
I may have been to starbucks and 2 classes with balls still written on my face...
I drunkenly sent a picture of my scrotum to the entire baseball team last night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I came over to his house for a party and realized I was quoted on the fridge... "How'd I get rug burn on my face?" And yes, my name was right next to it!
How do guys with small dicks who cheat on their girlfriends get girlfriends!?!
Going home with an argentinian named sulvio. Ill let you know how it goes.
do you think if she looks enough like a dude i have to come out to my parents?
If those antibiotics mean you can't drink, ya might as well pack your bags and re-enroll next fall, because sobriety this week would be social suicide.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you remember peeing in the sink while I was throwing up?
No ma'am, I do not. I found a video of us trying to do a trust fall though. Emphasis on the trying.
Stumbled across a pregnancy test in my closet. Oh, the freshman year flashbacks..
had a nice chat with the older gay fellow who works in the bakery at the new vons about vday...we both feel that it's a day of dashed expectations & concerns that we'll have to be cut out of our spanx
I have poison ivy and a broken finger. Don't have a threesome in the woods.
especially when i'm drunk. his dick might as well be made of cotton candy.
NO NINJA FIGHTING AT THE GAS STATION
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