I took the precaution of putting my macbook the one place in the dorm there is no way i can piss on it... the toilet
there's a picture of him beating off in the library with a cowboy hat. please steer clear of this one if you ever want to be respected.
Just to be safe, you should be prepared to jump out of a second story window
He was having an allergic reaction to that new brand of vodka Eric brought, so he just started chasing with benadryl.. Talk about commitment.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Are we still banned from the library?
I don't remember much but I think I'm wearing your underwear, and for that, I am extremely grateful.
I was basically shocked at how calmly you accepted my violently shoving a french fry in your mouth.
Imagine getting smashed in the dick by a basketball. A basketball made of metal. With spikes. That's pretty much what his dick looked like.
The EMT told me when I left the ER "I'd like to take off your pants again and inspect your package. Just not during a medical emergency..." We're hooking up tonight.
Points for getting a hot hook up after getting a shard of glass in your thigh. Almost makes it worth it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He said he was Greek American and that is why my legs slammed shut. During the World Cup there are only Americans.
Well puke fest 2014 just happened
It's dollar drink night and I have my honors society initiation tomorrow. Somehow I think this will not end well.
I'm not saying you're stupid, just that you have bad luck when thinking...
The coke machine at work is laughing at me. Literally. I just heard laughter from the coke machine
I'll be an awkward "I've had the grooms penis in my mouth" presence and we can party our nipples off.
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