It was like my butthole was peeing. Felt comforting yet not fulfilling.
I'm so high, I forgot to harvest my farmville crops....noooooooo.
Worst stoner tragedy.
Married on the beach in PCB while blackout drunk. Bonged beers on the sandbar for a bachelor party. They shotgunned beers at the end of the vows. How is spring break allowed to happen?
bouncer thought i was tryin to get the license plate numbers of strippers to stalk them. I had to go show him where I threw up to get back in.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have no words
Neither did my mom, when she walked in on me squating with my balls in a cup of hot water.
Some random at the bar just whispered in my ear that he wants to eat me out while on bath salts....
The shit I just took was four, very distinct colors. Jager night was a success
Drunk and alone at a magic show is what my life has become without you
Last thing I remember is whiskey shots. My roommate tells me we were there 15min before I decided to run home naked. And we live across from a police station.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was so high I didn't realize I'd put on someone else's bra. I thought my boobs had shrunk.
We smoked weed. AS A FAMILY. IT WAS BEAUTIFUL.
I’m going to try to be less of a cryptic bitch this week. Should be nice.
I woke up in a cornfield to shouting, a bottle of Jim Beam, and a bunch of mc muffins. If this doesn't scream Illinois, idk what does.
A guy who takes a plate of chicken tenders away from us is not to be trusted or slept with
Omg I got up from his bed and almost did a header into the wall because I came so many times I forgot how to walk.
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