This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
dude i dont realllllly have to fuck her do i? its just a mess down there and i think im gonna cry
He just showed up to brunch with one shoe and only the battery from his phone.
What would you do in exchange for having a girl eat a waffle house waffle off your body?
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It was so weird. She left to go to the bathroom and her older sister leaned towards me with a creepy smile and said, "You don't deserve her" and then continued to stare at me with a crazy expression for the rest of the evening.
That's kinky shit dude.
In this town being related to a brewing family or the owner of a sports team is like being royalty. It's like hooking up with the queen's nephew or something.
I told him I liked how shrimp feels in my mouth, but I don't actually like eating it. Turned out to be the most awkward way to say that I wanted to suck his dick.
I've decided he is effectively a mouth, hands and cock held together by bad ideas and compliments, and I'm OK with that.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
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shotgunning beer in rite aid bathroom. hurry
Just whatever you do, don't neglect the balls.
My grandpa is driving me to get condoms and wine. This is adulthood.
Found out the cop gives spectacular head. Don't ask. We're going out to dinner Saturday.
She is getting high and watching the Hobbit. I want her life.
So she is basically watching her own life story: short people traveling to strange places.
Ik youre sleeping but fyi its 5:32am I'm sitting in the middle of the road bra less and shoeless with boxers in my hand and no ride. Shits real crazy.
Randomize