Note to Self: No matter how horny, turned on or in the moment you are, never go down on your gf after she had soccer practice.
I'm glad you talked me out of that flying penis tattoo.
Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
I'm proud of us, I'm cleaning up the place and I haven't found a single beer can that isn't empty.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've come to realize that after waking up this morning for work no one wins in bar dice.
You have no idea how much I'm praying for my moms side of the family's infertility right now
Actually, you don't want to see me.. reached an all time low drinking kahlua out of the bottle concealed in a macdonalds bag
His penis contains the glue that keeps this relationship together.
Checked my photo vault today... My self nudie folder is passing the 150 mark.
The weird thing is that you don't send them to anyone. You just keep them for yourself...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I built a fence. For the bunnies we're going to adopt. I'll fill you in when you get home.
The woman that sang I Touch Myself died today. There's only one appropriate way to honor her memory.
I'm on the job.
We were licking ciroc off the poker table
Sorry about the nipples in that snapchat. It was meant for the Australian.
I tried to text you about going to the Lion's Den but sent it to my boss. She was down for it. Please advise.
Seriously where are the good guys?
The friend zone.
Randomize