Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
I GPSed you we're an hour and 14min away from each other
and it's going to stay that way
I wish I had my old roomstes number so I could send him pictures from lastnight... I had a blast banging his "true love" now that I think about it we're even don't worry about that gas bill you didn't pay. Ur girl worked it off!
My favorite part of the day is the 2 seconds of ignorance you have when you first wake up. Right before you remember where your mouth was last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do you think my job would send me for a second drug test if i took a whole pumpkin pie to work for lunch tomorrow?
Hey, I got 20% of the people home that I was responsible for. I can't be expected to do much more.
I have a theory he's part Neanderthal
The last thing I remember is crying and shaking my head as she was putting salt on my hand. I guess I took the shot
lesson learned. Never drop acid before a trip to the aquarium. Sounds awesome, is actually terrifying.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The best part about daylight savings time this weekend is we get an extra hour to be fucked up.
I made out with a girl because I wanted to get in the VIP section of the bar because they have these big comfy couches. It worked.
I'm currently trying to figure out a way to fill the bathtub up with mashed potatoes so when he comes over he'll know what's about to hit him..
He just started dry humping the air... I'm done
I swear to God...this day is one great big who's who in the land of fucked uppedness.
She threw her burger out the car window last night. My vegan neighbors were not pleased but I’m pretty sure I saw a for sale sign go up on their lawn so I owe her one.
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