do you know why "how to shave your balls" is bookmarked on my computer?
I found out that all you need to write a 12 page paper is adderall and twizzlers
is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
Foreign porn with subtitles is a little disappointing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I had the spins so badly it was like I was having sex with 2 girls
I'm sober enough to realize she looks like a man, but drunk enough to do it anyways
The last thing I remember was talking about the economic viability of cock ring manufacturing... we had some good ideas
This is going to be BYOBM Vegas trip: Bring Your Own Bail Money.
Some random at the bar just whispered in my ear that he wants to eat me out while on bath salts....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i came so hard i kicked through my windshield
... Cuz there's nothing like having your two male roommates catching you have a good cry in the driveway at 9am on a Wednesday.
Also I think I drunkenly signed up to be an uber driver or something because they keep emailing me to fill out a background check
Dude you literally tried to cook your phone in the microwave. You were so wasted you asked your mom to help you turn it on.
I think he thought I was too drunk to handle his parrot
You threw him in the dryer?
He went in of his own accord. Mumbled something about experiencing the blossoming of popcorn.
Randomize