Its not like he dircectly choose a cheeseburger over sex, it was more like I said seductively "I really appreciate this and I'm going to make it up to you anyway I can" and he replied "i want a bacon cheeseburger"
i guess he just knew i was going to sleep with him either way
you tried to do a keg stand and ended up flipping over it and onto the table
his dick makes me think maybe a monogamous relationship forever is possible.
I'm deep cleaning my room right now. Not sure if it actually needs it or if I'm just trying to symbolically cleanse myself of the last 24 hours.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
they drunkenly created an obstacle course for the poor hamster and its ball.
U thinks that's bad? He told me that he had to envision high school wrestling in order to bust a nut with some girl
Dude. I've never been with a guy who just wanted to go down on me all the time including while I'm shooting zombies on call of duty. My life is complete.
Omg have I shown you my skeezy ex fiancée?
The other one.
Last night turned out to be an expensive trip to your house between the ticket and the plan b. (Well I haven't gotten that yet)
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just did shots of fireball with my dad in a car wash. How's your pregaming going?
The cop said he like my hair today. Please explain all other interactions with law enforcement, k thanks
I AM NOT LOSING TO SOME FICTIONAL CROSSDRESSER
you know you're drunk when you start breaking down your body composition into organic molecules
I will teach you the ways of the ho life, my little gay grasshopper.
ever feel bored AND lazy?
I call it "awake" but yeah...
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