Does my surprise involve the use of a safe word?
Probably.
I'm in.
Come home. Power Hour by yourself is only fun for the first 10 minutes.
screw that ipod for my birthday.. i just want a weed brownie the size of my face. that's all.
Being a slut is okay if you're being a polite slut, right?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I took the precaution of putting my macbook the one place in the dorm there is no way i can piss on it... the toilet
Do you remember giving me altiods and wishing me good luck on the walk home?
He ended up walking out of his bedroom and told me to look at the nonexistent fire he was holding in his hand. Im upset I didn't take those shrooms.
and being hungover still at 4 in the afternoon is NOT "having allergies"
The cabbie told us to at least pretend we weren't doing coke while he was driving
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yea he called the cop officer fonzarelli and asked him if he was mad because happy days was off the air. Boom, beaten and arrested
I would like you to know I am eating your apology chocolate, which means i forgive you for puking everywhere before formal
Our group of friends now have more broken bones than reasonable excuses for why they're broken.
I've finally done it. I finally achieved my lifelong goal of becoming that awkward lesbian in high school who went on to have sex with more women than any of her male classmates.
As of right now, my vibrator and a bag of snickers share the same drawer
he went down on me WHILE i ate BACON PIZZA! best. boyfriend. ever.
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