I fink we're distracting them from bumping the proverbial uglies
Theres this fat girl in desperate need of the proactive factory in my class and as i watch her shovel food in her face I am struggling to not only keep down my meager lunch but also to stay straight. Eliza Dushku couldnt even get my flacid dick to move
And then I watched some old guy get arrested for meeting some other old guy for a blow job. It was epic.
I knew I shouldn't have slept with her...my dick looks like a stegosaurus tail
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Mom is telling us about the time she drank her own breast milk. Help.
The smiley face on that pregnancy test is so damn taunting. It's like it's laughing at me for my poor choices.
I really wish you were half the slut you're sister was in college
It's not my theme song, it's my blowjob song. There's a difference.
One last question would your parents let me sleep in your bathtub for the night?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah! I was just fired because there was an over hire and the new girl is hotter than me. Seeing as how the new girl is my baby sister I think punching my manager is excusable.
It's 10:15 on a Wednesday night and my dick is covered in pop rocks. How's your Wednesday going?
he just ran into my room in his giant penis costume yelling "supercock to the rescue"... I am still in total shock
How have you never felt a dick as hard as mine?
Secrets from the porn industry: liTERALLY SHOVE A SEA SPONGE UP YOUR VAGINA GO ON DO IT
I just got through airport security with 5 grams of weed in my back pocket. Either I deserve a metal or the government is slacking
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